What to Do If Your College Roommate Uses Your Stuff

In college, roommates have a lot to deal with: in addition to the stress of being in school, youre squished into a space that would be incredibly tiny for one person — not to mention two (or three or four). Just because youre sharing a space, however, doesnt necessarily mean that youre sharing all of your stuff, too. As the lines begin to blur between where one persons space ends and the others begins, its not uncommon for roommates to begin sharing things. Why have two microwaves, for example, when you really need just one? While some things make sense to share, others can create conflict. If your roommate has started using your stuff in a way that you dont like, hasnt been talked about, or was previously talked about but is now being disrespected, a simple act can quickly turn into something much bigger. If your roommate is borrowing (or just plain taking!) your stuff without checking with you first, there are some questions you can ask yourself when trying to figure out what to do about the situation: How Big of an Issue Is This for You? Maybe you talked about sharing items and your roommate has disregarded the agreement you made together. How much does that bother, annoy, or anger you? Or does it make sense that he or she used your things without asking? Is it a big deal or not? Try not to think about how you think you should feel; think about how you do feel. True, some people may not care if a roommate borrows their iron, but if it bothers you, then be honest with yourself about that. Conversely, if your friends seem outraged that your roommate borrowed your clothes but you dont really mind, then know thats okay, too. Pattern or Exception Your roommate might be absolutely great and she took a little of your cereal and milk just once because she was super, super hungry late one night. Or she may take your cereal and milk two times a week and now youre just sick of it. Consider whether this is a small incident that likely wont happen again or a larger pattern that you would like stopped. Its okay to be bothered by either one, and its especially important to address any bigger issues (e.g., the pattern) if and when you confront your roommate about his or her behavior. Is It a Personal Item or Something General? Your roommate may not know that, for example, the jacket he borrowed was your grandfathers. Consequently, he may not understand why youre so upset that he borrowed it one night when it was unseasonably cold. While all of the things you brought to college matter to you, your roommate doesnt know the values you assign to everything. So, be clear on what was borrowed and why its not okay (or totally fine) for your roommate to borrow it again. What Bugs You About the Situation? You may be bothered that your roommate took something that you told him not to; you may be bothered that he did it without asking; you may be bothered that he didnt replace it; you may be bothered that he takes a lot of your stuff without checking with you first. If you can figure out what bugs you the most about your roommates use of your stuff, you can better address the real issue at hand. So sure, your roommate may have a reason for taking your last energy drink, but its harder to explain why he is constantly helping himself to the last of your things. What Resolution Do You Want? You might just want an apology or an acknowledgment that your roommate took something he or she wasnt entitled to take. Or you may want something larger, like a conversation or even a formal roommate contract about what its okay and not okay to share. Think about what you need to feel better about the situation. That way, when you do talk to your roommate (or RA), you can be focused on a larger goal instead of just feeling frustrated and like you dont have any options. How to Best Come to a Resolution Once you figure out what kind of resolution you want, its important to also figure out how you can get there. If you want an apology, youll need to talk to your roommate; if you want clearer rules in place, youll need to think about what those rules might be before starting a conversation. If you can take the time and mental energy to focus on the causes of and solutions to the problem, your roommates use of your stuff doesnt have to be anything more than a minor issue you thought about, addressed, and resolved during your time as roommates. After all, you both have much bigger things to worry about.

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen Essay example - 2034 Words

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen Jane Austen wrote Pride and prejudice. Jane Austin was born on the 16 of December in 1775 at Steven ton Recovery. I think in this story Jane Austin tries to show how people judging others on first impression can go misleading people into the wrong judgement of each other. Life was very different for people back those days. People were most concerned about wealth and family class. Ladies especially were suffering because a ladies did not go to work therefore she couldnt go on earning her own money, so marring a rich man was her way of solving her financial gain. If a women was not very pretty than she was not expected to find a very rich man. The†¦show more content†¦Connel Fitzwilliam slips out that Mr Darcy had lately congratulated himself on lately having saved a friend from the inconvenience of a most imprudent marriage, not aware that she is the sister of the women who Mr Darcy had prevented his friend from marring. Connel Fitzwilliam than explains that Mr Darcy had felt that the ladies family was not suitable. Mr Darcy prejudice against the Bennets is clearly showing by the way he has dealt with this situation. Mr Darcy had felt Jane was not good enough for Mr Bingly because she did not match up to his standards. These standards were Jane s family fortune, because the Bennts are rich and Mr Darcy therefore, believes that it is not right to marry any one who is a social class lower than you. This shows that Mr Darcy has clear objections to the Bennets because they are not wealthy and that his prejudice of differences of social class had made him interfere with Mr Bingly s wish in marring Jane Bennet. Mr Darcy other reasons were the Bennets family, they have obsessive mother who no knows no shame and her only aim is to see her daughters married to a rich men. Elizabeths mother is always going on about Mr Darcy being proud and constantly attacks verbally him when ever she comes to acquaintance with him. Elizabeths mother does not show anything for the Bennets to be proud of and in fact she causes her familyShow MoreRelatedPride And Prejudice By Jane Austen Essay1724 Words   |  7 PagesThe 18th century novel, Pride and Prejudice, by Jane Austen, is a fascinating book about a young woman’s struggle with family and love. Pride and Prejudice was originally published in 1813, but, the most common version of the story, and the one used for this research, is from the version published in 1892, still by only Jane Austen, though many other authors have contributed to this book over time. 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Greek Femininity Essay Example For Students

Greek Femininity Essay Greek Ideas on Gender RolesThroughout history, the roles of women and men have always differed to some degree. In ancient Greece, the traditional roles were clear-cut and defined. Women stayed home to care for children and do housework while men left to work. This system of society was not too far off the hunter gatherer concept where women cared for the house and the men hunted. Intriguingly enough, despite the customary submissive role, women had a more multifaceted role and image in society as juxtaposed with the rather simple role men played. Morals for the two were also different. Men obviously had the upper hand with women being the traditional passive. For an example, it was quite acceptable for a man to commit adultery- however a woman was to remain chaste. The only exception to this was if the lover in question was a god. For some odd reason, it seemed that men were allowed to be philanderers while their wives stayed at home. This is evidenced in the Odyssey quite well- Odys seus the ‘hero’ is free to sample all the pretty ladies he cares to, whereareas Penelope his wife is expected to fend off all the suitors at home. Predictably, Penelope melts into his arms when she realizes it is her long lost husband without pausing to consider what he has done in his absence. This reaction portrays the unequal morals of Greek society regarding gender. Euripides’s Medea portrays women who are not quite as lucky as Penelope:â€Å"Oh, unfortunate one, Oh cruel! Where will you turn? Who will help you? What house or what land to preserve you from ill can you find? Medea, a god has thrown suffering upon you in waves of despair.† In this play, Medea’s husband Jason has left her and their children to fend for themselves while he cavorts with his new princess bride. Generally speaking, there is nothing Medea can do and the attitude conveyed by the Corinthian women thoroughly explains this. As shown, women were considered naturally submissive as in most other old cultures. This is somewhat understandable as women were the ones who bore children and men provided for the family unit. As time progressed, this stereotype was over emphasized into what is portrayed in these plays and poems. Despite this submissive image, Greek women were not considered na?ve, but a pleasurable if a bit foolish kind of a creature. In Aristophane’s play, Lysistrata, this concept is amply portrayed. Most of the women are portrayed, as impulsive individuals while men are carnal gluttons. Notwithstanding this facet of their image women could also be wily as Medea and Lysistrata: â€Å"What is more, you were born a woman, And women, though most helpless in doing good deeds, Are of every evil the cleverest of contrives†The deceitful female is epitomized by the character of Aphrodite in Euripidies’s Hippolytus. Due to having her altar neglected (as in the case of Psyche) she plot ted to bring ruin to Hippolytus and all those who loved him. At the end of the play, Artemis plots revenge against Aphrodite (also called Cypris) saying:â€Å"Hush, that is enough! You shall not be unavenged,Cypris shall find the angry shafts she hurlsAgainst you for you’re your piety and innocenceShall cost her dear. I’ll wait until she loves a mortal next time,And with this hand—with these unerring arrowsI’ll punish him.†Thus it is not only the mortal women who are vindictive, but it is the very nature of womankind To be passively wicked. One of the few exceptions to the image of the submissive Greek woman were the Amazons. The Amazons were a race of mythical warrior women who were completely dedicated to their work. When they reached maturity, they burned off one of their breasts to make archery easier, and dominated what men they kept. Their male children were killed and only the girls were kept. Artemis the huntress and her followers also defied traditional imagery. Yet no non-virgin was a part of Artemis’s coterie which excludes the majority of women. However independent, even the legendary Amazons were defeated by a man. In the labors of Hercules, one of his tasks was to fetch the girdle of the Amazon Queen. Hercules was received unusually well by the Amazo ns. However, he finished by killing their Queen by misjudgment after he obtained her girdle. Thus a man crushed even the Amazons. .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee , .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee .postImageUrl , .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee .centered-text-area { min-height: 80px; position: relative; } .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee , .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee:hover , .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee:visited , .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee:active { border:0!important; } .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee .clearfix:after { content: ""; display: table; clear: both; } .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee { display: block; transition: background-color 250ms; webkit-transition: background-color 250ms; width: 100%; opacity: 1; transition: opacity 250ms; webkit-transition: opacity 250ms; background-color: #95A5A6; } .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee:active , .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee:hover { opacity: 1; transition: opacity 250ms; webkit-transition: opacity 250ms; background-color: #2C3E50; } .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee .centered-text-area { width: 100%; position: relative ; } .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee .ctaText { border-bottom: 0 solid #fff; color: #2980B9; font-size: 16px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0; padding: 0; text-decoration: underline; } .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee .postTitle { color: #FFFFFF; font-size: 16px; font-weight: 600; margin: 0; padding: 0; width: 100%; } .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee .ctaButton { background-color: #7F8C8D!important; color: #2980B9; border: none; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: none; font-size: 14px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 26px; moz-border-radius: 3px; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-shadow: none; width: 80px; min-height: 80px; background: url(https://artscolumbia.org/wp-content/plugins/intelly-related-posts/assets/images/simple-arrow.png)no-repeat; position: absolute; right: 0; top: 0; } .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee:hover .ctaButton { background-color: #34495E!important; } .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee .centered-text { display: table; height: 80px; padding-left : 18px; top: 0; } .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee-content { display: table-cell; margin: 0; padding: 0; padding-right: 108px; position: relative; vertical-align: middle; width: 100%; } .u9fea5e688b8a31b0a7d1c51ca6964bee:after { content: ""; display: block; clear: both; } READ: Iraq and united states EssayMost of the Greek myths reinforce this idea of male superiority. In the myth of Cupid and Psyche, it is Psyche’s feminine curiosity, which drives Cupid away. Only by enduring hardships is Psyche allowed to be reunited with Cupid although it was Cupid who drove Psyche to investigate as to who her husband was. This myth implies that women must not question the will of men even though what they do is nonsensical. Sophocles further examines this point in the play Antigone. Antigone, daughter of the incestuous Oedipus is the protagonist is punished for merely trying to give her brother a burial. Commonly speaking, a burial is the only decent t hing a sister can do for her brother, yet she is forbidden for doing so. She then commits suicide whereupon her fianc?e the king’s son also commits suicide. The play Antigone explores two different attitudes taken by Greek women. Antigone is the fiery woman who insists on doing what she believes is right which she gets punished for. Ismene is submissive and frightened, yet she ultimately suffers also. In other words, no matter what a woman does, she will suffer- yet the more rebellious one will be directly squelched. In addition to the idea of masculine superiority is the principle of the male protector. In the myth of Eurydice and Orpheus, a snake bites Eurydice and she dies. Orpheus then attempts to rescue her from Hades and almost succeeds but ultimately fails in the end by looking back. Despite the failure the point remains that the Greeks decided that it was Orpheus who tries to save Eurydice instead of Eurydice saving Orpheus. Sappho implies in her poem(s) that women ar e very susceptible to emotions by using herself as an example. In her poems she is wholly taken up by each emotion. In Byron’s Don Juan, Sappho is referred to as ‘†¦burning Sappho loved and sung†¦ ’ Indicating how emotional her writing was. This attitude is echoed in the Victorian age, which unsurprisingly was influenced by the culture of the ancient Greeks. Many psychologists developed their theories on human development by using the Greek myths; therefore our culture is still permeated by classic mythology. For an example, Freud developed his famous theory regarding child development from the story of Oedipus. Ancient Greece was definitely a patriarchal society. Brides went to their husband’s home. Her property also presumably became his. In Medea, Jason explains this aspect of marriage in his explanation of his political reasons of marrying the princess for the benefit of Medea and her children. It was not only the domestic sphere that was aff ected by gender. Vengeance was considered vulgar and inappropriate in ladies, and acceptable in men. Clytymnestra was berated as a whore for taking a lover and killing her husband Agamemnon, even though he killed his own child to guarantee killing other people. Medea was berated for avenging herself on Jason. Conversely, vengeance is perfectly fine for men as shown by Achilles killing Hector for Patrocleus. Asides from vengeance, infanticide is viewed differently also. Medea killing her children is considered base where Agamemnon killing his daughter is excusable. Men and women lived in completely dissimilar spheres, until the time of marriage. Even after marriage, they still retained strong ties to their own spheres by Achilles and Patrocleus. This is aspect of young life is depicted by Sappho in her poems. Apparently alternative lifestyles were commonly accepted in youth and continued throughout adulthood. This passive encouragement of homosexuality further strengthened ties betwe en the separate genders and emphasizing the differences. Human society does not really change. The roles each gender plays in society has not changed drastically since the time of the ancient Greeks, and this goes to suggest that these roles are deeply rooted and possibly genetic. However chauvinistic Greek myths are telling the truth, which explains why they have influenced modern culture to the extent it has. Mythology Essays